Day 15: New Year’s Eve

Dear Momma,

I know you would have loved our family time yesterday. The day started off with some kinks – leaving late, traffic in the snow for an hour, even heavier weather conditions for others. But you know us – nothing ever goes just as perfectly planned in the Espiritu clan. But we all made it to Michigan safely nonetheless.

When we got there, I got to glam up with my sisters for a family photo. LydiaGrace showed me what contouring looks like, Christina straightened my hair, and I wore lipstick for one of the first times. It was really nice to listen to music and chill with my sisters as we made ourselves pretty (though I know you would say to all of your daughters that we’re beautiful without all the makeup 😊). Then we went downstairs for a sister photo in the snow and a family photo inside. It’s hard not to miss you each year when we take these photos and you’re not in them.

Then we opened all our Christmas presents! It’s always a joy to open them with family and the little ones. I used to be the baby of the family who got to choose first and pass out presents and help unwrap. But not anymore! I think Sapphira and Adelaide had us covered. Each present was gifted and received with love. I’m blessed to have sisters who love me and know me well.

After that we watched a family classic – While You Were Sleeping – while the little ones and their parents played Uno in the other room. Later we’d play games like Code Names and Apples to Apples. But as I watched other couples cuddle on the couch and enjoy one another’s presence, I’ll admit, it was hard not to feel a twinge of sadness that my boyfriend wasn’t there. But I heard your voice telling me that I’m still overjoyed to be with my fun-loving family whom I don’t get to see that often and that I should push sad thoughts of him aside to enjoy myself to the fullest.

Then came the Cup of Blessing, one of my favorite withstanding New Years traditions in the Espiritu Family. It’s a moment of fellowship and vulnerability and real talk and raw reflection. I love hearing about my family’s year, most of which I haven’t been present in their lives to experience with them. It was a moment for me to open up about a few things. It took a lot of courage, Momma, but I think you’d be proud. I got to tell them about the happy things in my life, too, especially my newly budding relationship with Tyler.

We all miss you, Momma. Throughout all the joy this season and this time together brings, many tears were shed. I felt the pain of others; I felt others feeling my pain. Together with the rest of my other sisters, we gathered around a sister who has gone through so much this year, all without a mother there to dry her tears. 2019 has been a roller coaster of emotions for all of us. But at the end of the day, we’re all there for each other in your absence.

It’s hard not to wish you were here, but Happy New Year all the same, Momma! I bet the party up there is like no other, even though I’m not sure if time and the New Year is that relevant in Heaven haha. Thank you for instilling in all your children the importance of togetherness. We’re all this close because of that unbreakable bond you told us we had all those years ago. I love you, Momma. Happy Holidays in Heaven! 😊😊

-Sara Joy

~ by Sara Espiritu on January 1, 2020.

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